Crystal Harris is a ‘Runaway Bride,’ Selena Gomez Seems to Think Canada is a Third World Country and Suri Cruise Walks in Heels Better Than I Do. Today’s Style Headlines:

Suri Cruise is said to have a shoe collection worth $150,000. The 5-year-old has a thing for heels and Momma Katie supports this fetish with custom made Louboutin’s to fit her tiny feet. Two things; one – I am worried about the over development of her calves, and two – I never thought I’d be jealous of a 5-year-old, but alas never say never. (Refinery 29)

Fergie explains to Allure Magazine why she tends to look preggers saying ‘she fluctuates from the thighs up’. First of all, good to know the weight of your shins and feet are under control. Second, don’t ever give an interview that can be reduced to the title, “Why I Sometimes Look Pregnant.” (Huffpost Entertainment)

Crystal Harris must have just realized Hef has an ironclad pre-nup because girl just called off her upcoming wedding to the 85 year old. (The Superficial)

Denise Richards is reportedly writing a memoir about her marriage to Charlie Sheen. Richards claims her memoir will focus on the ‘good things’ about her marriage. Well that’s going to be a fast read and let’s not play fast and loose with the word ‘writing’. (PopEater)

Stella McCartney threw a garden party to show off her Resort Collection. Of course her girl babes Liv Tyler and Naomi Watts were in attendance; Stellie always has her girls. Oh and Bono, because what is a garden party without Bono? (FabSugar)

So Selena Gomez blames ‘malnourishment’ as the reason for her recent hospital visit. I’m confused. Malnourished? Honey you’re from Texas not Africa. Take a break from making-out and eat some food. Period. (People)

Written by the ZOMG LOL ROFL funny Jessica Di Clemente – check her out if you want good abs.