I have a confession to make: There have been multiple occasions where I’ve found myself absentmindedly perusing various Internet Website dedications to (former) blonde teenage beauty, Chloe Grace Moretz. I couldn’t tell you why so much of my time was invested to fetes so ostentatious, but now that those hours of my life have long-departed, I regret nothing.
Let me clarify that all of this Internet-creepage was done in the least weird way possible, as my dedication stems from pure admiration, good intentions, and not inappropriate obsession. Either way, each paragraph that I skimmed (at length) informed me that the teenage superstar frequently replies to the tweets of strange humans. “That could be me!” I exclaimed. And thus, this series of anecdotes has become semi-relevant, and my determination to become best friends with Chloe Moretz has now become a public idea that I hope can be shared amongst ourselves and our relevant social circles. To further add ~dimension~ to this very understandable topic, here are some pictorial executions of things that Chloe and I could do together once we’re #besties…so…I hope you enjoy!
In-Depth Introductory Expansions:
You may be wondering why out of all the (completely accessible) celebrities that could be my new best friend, why I choose a 16 year old girl. And while I’d love to answer that question for you, the reasons are so plentiful I’m not sure where to begin. So let me just say:
1) She’s “kick ass”
2) She embodies the youth I wish I still possessed
3) She is blessed with the natural blonde hair I wish I had
4) She has a shoe closet so ~*quirky*~ I’m not even sure it’s real life
My Plan of Action
Now that you are a bit more familiar as to how my determined friendship goal came into fruition, let me divulge the inner-workings of my BFF-acquisition schemes. The first step, obviously, is the creation of this post. This not only pitches my *really good* idea to the world and Chloe’s PR people and her real-life self, but also proves that my ideas are great and we would subsequently be a really great and dynamic best friend duo. The age difference doesn’t matter – the only thing that matters is the fact that I have created physical visualization of this scenario. Hence, my face.
We could have sip tea and eat scones whilst gossiping about Aaron Johnson
Source: IMBD / gettyimages / fashionbeautytrend.com
We could talk about how great it is to have Joseph Gordon-Levitt’s (maybe fictional, maybe real) trust and admiration
We could curse together (but only in secret because excuse me OFFENSIVE and also THUGGIN’)
We could wear denim on denim – aka the /best/ excuse to stand in front of the Canadian flag
Source: gettyimages / fashionbeautytrend.com
We could talk about Ryan Gosling and maybe arrange a helicopter ride with him and his dog
We could have hat parties (#hatparty!!!)
We could hang out with her blonde brothers
Source: @cmoretz on Instagram
We could emulate Rihanna at different stages of her career
Source: Fanpop / @badgalriri on Instagram
So what do you think, Chloe?????? Biffles for life??????